why do we strive for perfection?

 

this has been a really important question for me over the last few years, because perfectionism is something that has derailed me at various points in my life. it sounds so silly, but i have had this conversation countless times with other women where i mention that i am being obsessively perfectionistic about something + their eyes light up as they say “oh my god, i do that.” we gloss over it so as to not give it too much weight – treat it like a small moment of connection between humans who share a similar character flaw. but what are the origins + implications of perfectionism?

 

i have a few theories, but i will start with this: it is not an organic state of mind, to strive for perfection. it is learnt. it is an ideal that has been taught to us through successful marketing, because big brands sell more products when we feel insecure about who we are + what we have. so this ideal persona has been created for us + good marketing ensures that it is constantly out of our reach. these are basic high school grade ideas but i feel like we lose sight of this constantly. we re-apply our makeup, criticise our bodies, overanalyse our words, our body language, our mental state – mindlessly, without really questioning why it is that we do that. and, as far as i can take note of, it is gendered. women are made to feel as though they, themselves, are not enough. while men are made to feel as though what they have is not enough.

 

we live in a society that feeds on our insecurities + so we have to actively practice gratitude + self-acceptance; we need to focus more on admiring other peoples’ strengths, rather than drawing on comparisons. we need to feel secure within ourselves + comfortable in our natural state. you know what you need to do to get to that.

 

enjoy your classes, lovers.

 

danni x